Random Poetry

Its june. The grief is sweating through my skin like an ice cream cone in the summer. 

The months are flying by quicker and quicker. Why did time only stop for me when you died. Was i the only one who truly felt the pain of a sword being slowly pushed into my chest as i gasped for air trying to understand. Why me but most of all why you. What lesson does death teach you. That nothing last forever? The art of detachment and showing you the beauty of the ending of life. I sadly have yet to find the beauty in missing someone forever. I only cry and continue to question myself if i was ever truly ready for life. Im not sure where this one was going im fried its late bye.

upcoming updates/storys

 I also realize there is so many gaps in my writing 😖😖 I will definitely be coming back more often and soon to fill in and actually give you all the details of what the FUCK has been happening but for now i think some poetry will suffice.

hey!

 As the sun still shines ,  my inferno still burns deep. I could say things have gotten better but at what point would it be a lie and my smile fade? The roller coaster of emotions I've dealt with the past year have been traumatizing. Death and grief are something I've grown so familiar with in the last 7 months.

I tried the love thing again and once again.. a failure in that department. I would've thought this was the one. I was truly wrong. We tried and tried and tried and every single time i cut the flowers in my garden trying to prove i was the gardener. I am devastated to have the knowledge that they've moved on. You were truly the one that got away and i will forever love everything we had together but i am here now begging God and the universe to help make me forget you. I can no longer go on like this.

In all i feel like i have completely gone numb to any emotion regarding wanting love or relationships or anything like that. The thought of sex alone is beginning to become repulsive to me. But ill save that for the next bid.